Friday, November 25, 2016

Maui's Pa without fire

Maui's Pa without fire Retold by Seamus
Standing on a hill, Maui gazed around his Pa.
“I wonder what the Pa would look like if there isn't any fire?” Maui thought. Night fell and Maui crept out of his whare with a gourd full of water. He saw the first fire and poured water over it. The fire sizzled and made little wisps of smoke, as it went out and he repeated this to all the other fires. Once done he crept back to his whare and fell asleep.

The next morning  Maui yawned and woke up,
The people from the Pa are banging on his door shouting “MAUI WHY DID YOU PUT OUT ALL THE FIRES???” and “MAUI GET OUT HERE THIS INSTANT!!!!!!”
“And if I don’t?” He asked the people of the Pa.
“Alright!!!!” he yelled. He opens the door. “All you have to do is go get some from the Fire Witch, in the volcano”.
“Well you do it then” They told him.
“Fine” said Maui, And he set off to get more fire from the volcano.

He arrived at the hellish place full of bubbling pits of tar and lava.
In the middle of the pits and cracked earth stood the Volcano itself, home of the fire witch. The fire witch’s name was Mahuika and on her fingers were ten hot flames. He walked into the Entrance of Mahuika’s Lava Cave, but at the same time Mahuika fired flame from her fingers. Maui ducked and the flame, sparking as it went hit the wall. BOOOOOM!!!! “Look” said Maui “All I want is a flame for my Pa’s fires” “Well in that case sure you can have one but don’t let it go out” said Mahuika. “YAY” yelled Maui. ”THANK YOU Mahuika!!”

Maui walked back carefully to the village with his flame. Suddenly a huge fish burst out of the water snapping and biting Maui. “OW” Maui cried in pain. Maui threw his flame at the fish. It turned red and disintegrated into dust. Maui then ran back to Mahuika and asked for another flame. Mahuika said “Ok Maui BUT DON’T LOSE IT”.
“Ok” Maui said. Maui then started walking back to his Pa with his flame.

Maui finally reached his Pa. The trip had taken him 5 Days because he spent one day getting there and the rest, getting the flame and coming home. The People Of the Pa jumped up and said “Maui, your back! Now we can light the fires again! The Leader of the Pa grabbed the flame out of Maui’s hands. Then he ran over to one of the fires and threw the flame at it. The fire ignited and threw a huge cloud of smoke ash into the air. He then jumped up and down and ran around shouting “YAY OUR FIRE IS BACK!!”. He then ran over to all of the other fires and started to light the rest of them too. Maui just sat down watching him and then fell asleep.

What was tricky with the writing?
Finding words to end my story.
What would you do better next time?
Add more detail, maybe make it a
bit more interesting.
I am most proud of……

My words that I used in my story and my way I retold it.

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